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by lycorisrxdiata



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Excerpt of a Series., Genderqueer Character, M/M, Memory Loss, Other, Post-Anime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 12:51:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4222377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lycorisrxdiata/pseuds/lycorisrxdiata
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>if there's such a thing as fate i think you and i are always meant to find each other, even when i've lost it all and can't say your name. (post-anime, Canon AU, AyaKane. rated M for sexual content.)</p>
            </blockquote>





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**Author's Note:**

> A/N: you know, for somebody can barely read smut of her OTP, i somehow managed to make this both incredibly gay, and pretty damn lewd.
> 
> at any rate, here's a one (maybe two) shot of a post-anime, Canon AU idea i've had simmering for the past week. the premise is that everything in Root A happened, in addition to the fact that Kaneki fought Arima. the difference is that he survived, but not without sustaining serious injury, the result of which left his memory shattered - the only thing he knows now is his name, and that he's a half-ghoul. 
> 
> for the next few years, he sets up shop in the seventh ward, having learned how to tattoo ghouls with specialized needles. all of his friends - Touka, Hinami, Tsukiyama, and co. - come into his lives again, but never tell him of the truth because they think he's happier not knowing about his downfall. this works, until a beautiful stranger (Ayato) enters the shop, making Kaneki then wonder if they had ever met before...
> 
> tell me what you think! - i have a hard time writing anything that is not a short story/one shot, because i can never keep something going /sobs, but if i get enough interest in this i might follow up and try to flesh it out more. so, enjoy, drop your comments, leave kudos!!

IT'S HARD TO SAY what got into Kaneki when those words poured out from parted lips - & with his hands on that silken thigh, no less. Any chance for this alluring stranger to be just another customer with a simple request for a tattoo was tossed right out the window.

For a second, he almost wishes he could rewind that moment. Take it back, perhaps, and remain in awe of that ethereal beauty without embarrassing himself.

In the end, however, there was no need to regret his choice of words. He is _elated_ that the stranger agreed; what was once a fleeting encounter in his shop had grown into a first outing at : **re** , evening ending with the pair at the front door of his date's enclave of an apartment.

"This was nice, Kaneki." Once neutral expression, now lightening up to reveal just a hint of a smile. "Thanks..."

"Ah, no. I should thank you." Laughing, "I asked you so suddenly, and in the middle of a session, no less. I'm surprised you agreed."

Lithe digits slip into the keychain. Fumbling with them, for time. "Don't be. I'm fond of you."

"You speak as if you know of me."

How odd. This is not the first time tonight that Kaneki has seen those eyes bore right through him. Through him, and right into the core of something that he himself could not even reach.

Had they met before, and he simply could not remember?

"You can say that."

A pause.

"Kirishima-kun, I'm still rather curious...your name - "

"You know my name."

"Kirishima is only your surname, isn't it?"

"Yes, but that's not what I meant. You know my first name. You just forgot."

Oh, and that makes those snow-white brows knit. Hues, glazing over as he scours the depths of his memory for it. Surely, if he had told Kaneki his first name, he would be sure to remember it. However bad his ability to recall things was, it could not be so that he would just FORGET what to call his date.

"I'm... not sure that I do. Forgive me."

That head shakes, and a throaty chuckle escapes parted lips as he lean in; hues, laced over with lust.

"Stay with me tonight? Maybe I'll give you a reminder..."

There is no thought put into the reply. His palms are quick to rest on Kirishima thighs; skin, just brushing along the hem of that frilly, high-waisted skirt.

To consume this pretty, _pretty_ thing all for himself -

"I can't say no."

"I hoped you wouldn't."

So things turn. Curious conversation is replaced with curious hands pushing upward, upward, until they've pushed the younger's skirt up and gripping his ass. Lips, pressed together. Coming close. Parting. A sound of worship, Kaneki thinks.

A place, to kneel.

"Let's go in..."

Kirishima fumbles with the door to get in, trying hard to stick the damn key in its hole between heavy kisses. Once open, however, all bets are off - they enter a game of chase-the-rabbit - Kirishima, leading, and Kaneki, quite close on his heels.

His chase is rewarded with the younger pinned beneath him on the mattress, and it is here that he can't help but take pause.

Once more, a weight settles in Kaneki's chest. Yes, of course the first time he glanced up from his work to see this frighteningly beautiful person perched in front of the shop, something had already CLICKED...

But now?

Now, the urgency of the matter makes an instrument outta his heartstrings. Was it those amethyst hues, wide-eyed and searching, that captured him? Did the all-too-familiar sight of indigo locks, falling just to the nape of his fine neck, stir in Kaneki this desperate _ache_?

He wants to know. He wants to know, so he searches - palm, rubbing slow circles along Kirishima's chest. Ruffling up the blouse he wore until he picks loose each button.

( **who are you looking for? why do you look through me?** )

"Kirishima-kun..." Fingers trail along his neck, his jaw, his lips. Settle inside his mouth, where he sucks until a thin string of saliva starts to trail down... "Kirishima-kun, you're so beautiful, do you know that?"

He responds by flushing, cheeks dusted red. Kaneki continues; lips, kissing along the curvature of his collarbones while a free hand rubs his partner's cock through thin lacewear.

( **i want you to look at me. i'm here. i'm here, with you, and i want you until nothing remains.** )

"F-fuck...Kane - "

"I'm quite selfish." This is murmured hot into his ear while he continues to rub, thumb pressing into the swollen head. "I want you all for myself."

Beneath him, Kirishima is nothing but a trembling mess; his hips rock into the palm, and with his own, shaking hands, he can only manage to stick a hand down Kaneki's pants. Fingers, wrapping around the base while he gives a few strokes of his own.

"You...oh, God...talk too much...fuckface." & both share weak laughs between their moans. "..I'm already yours."

 _Already yours_. That phrase both elates, yet unnerves Kaneki, for it seems like yes, Kirishima _was_ only his to begin with, yet he still cannot remember where that beginning lay.

( **did we meet in another life? are you looking for the me that used to be?** )

"Kane - fu ck...fuck me...fuckme please..."

He agrees, but moves toward preparation first. Kirishima's protests ('just get the lube and put it in already, i'm fine -' ), but Kaneki still insists; two digits, slick, now thrusting and curling inside of the younger.

If he could have nothing else, he'd want this single moment. To burn that look of utter _need_ into his memory 'til death he would part, to look back and hear the way Kirishima's mouth parts so that he could moan louder, louder. To remember how those little hips rock down to meet the rhythm...

...and still, those eyes keep searching for a man that's not here right now.

( **don't search for somebody else. be with me, Aya -** )

"!!"

Kaneki's fingers slip out, argent hues wide with confusion. Aya...Aya-what? Was that a name? Was that _his_ name, and he was now pulling it from the brink of nothing where it might be recalled once more?

"Kaneki...come here. Kiss me..."

His time to dwell is pushed aside by these words; leaning down, he captures that parted mouth in a soft kiss. A groan can't help but escape him as Kirishima's now-slick palms coat his cock with lubricant.

"Ah, Kiri...shima...impatient..."

"I know." Laughing against his mouth, "But I want it in me..."

What else could he do, but be made malleable by those words?

Kaneki tugs down the lacewear, tossing it to the side. With one hand clutching Kirishima's, the other is used to angle himself. Head, pressing in...

"Ohmygod..." Those silken thighs wrap tight around his waist as he finishes sliding in. Both of them, a trembling heap pressed tight together.

He thinks he's been waiting for this for years, now, for him to be buried deep in Kirishima. For him to be rocking his hips so hard the sound of skin, the sound of the mattress, is still so _quiet_ compared to the noises that slip from that parted mouth...

"Kane..gonna - fuck...I'mgonnacomeI'mgonna - "

"God...come for me...Kirishima-kun..."

Faster. Kaneki keeps going faster, _faster_ , until he's got that head rolling back, until that body begins to tense and tremble beneath his fingertips, until -

"FuckKane ki I - "

"Aya - "

They both grow still for a moment as they come; Kaneki, inside of him, and Kirishima, all over their stomachs. Between the clutch of pleasure and the edge of reality, there is the eye contact that they make, and it's in those fleeting seconds that Kaneki swears Kirishima had, for the first time since they met, looked right into his soul,

and found what he was looking for.

 

♠

 

HOW FOOLISH OF HIM to believe that Kaneki could remember so quickly. To hear his name - part of it, at least - roll right off that mouth he so loved to kiss was almost enough to make Ayato break on the spot.

There is no time to shed tears, though. No time for somebody at the top to be so weak. All he could do was press his palms together and, perhaps pray to a God he did not believe in if it meant that Kaneki would get his memories back.

"You still won't tell me, I suspect?"

Persistent fucker. Giving him those doleful eyes through tangled, white locks. The temptation is great, he thinks, but -

"You got part of it. Ain't that a start?"

"Ah, but I...I'm not sure how. You say that I know it, but I still don't think you've ever told me."

"I have. You just can't remember it, right now."

Kaneki sighs - in defeat, Ayato suspects, but all the same. He can't help but smirk a little.

"...I think I would like to start calling you Aya-kun, though. Would you mind?"

A shake of the head. He closes his eyes and hides himself in Kaneki's neck.

"No."

"Ah, good."

Fingers run along the curve of his spine, making his body shiver. How long did he wait for this day? To be of age and finally able to enjoy Kaneki to claim him in all senses of the word?

So much for 'out of sight, out of mind.'

"Say, Aya-kun..."

"Mmhm."

"Is this...would it be possible, if..."

"If 'yer askin' to take me out again..." And, pressing a kiss to his throat, he smiles. "...then don't, 'cus the answer is yes."

Silence befalls them after, as does slumber. One still wonders if they've met before, if the ease with which they moved into this territory is because they have traversed it in another life. The other, knowing yes, they have, and waiting. Waiting, for the return.


End file.
